Question 1

What if I don't feel anything?

Accepted Answer

Common, and especially common early on. The practice is the intention and the phrases, not the feeling — keep saying them to the person you're picturing and let whatever arrives arrive. Some sits are warm and some are just five minutes of saying words at a mental image. Both count.

Question 2

Who should the difficult person be?

Accepted Answer

Someone mildly irritating: the colleague who replies-all, the neighbour with the leaf blower. Never someone who has seriously harmed you — that's a different practice, usually with a therapist in the room. If the stage gets heavy, go back to your loved one for a few breaths, or tap Next stage. Skipping it is fine.

Question 3

Why start with someone else rather than myself?

Accepted Answer

Because most people find warmth for someone they love easier to feel than warmth for themselves, and it's easier to turn something inward once it's already going. If you'd rather start with yourself, nothing here is enforcing the order — the stages just arrive in the one most people find easiest.

Loving-kindness — a free guided meditation timer